What's the worth?

After midnight and pre-dawn calls from home are the ones that can make your heartbeat racing. I got one such dreaded call a fortnight back. I saw 2 missed calls from my dad at 6:15 in the morning after I came out of showers. First thing I did was to pray to the God and then call back to my dad. By the time my dad picked up the call, I made numerous guesses. And then finally, dad broke the sad news of my Mom’s uncle’s sad demise due to two back-to-back heart attacks. I was stunned.

My dad told me in clear words that I don’t need to rush to home, as I would not be able to attend the funeral and advised me to try to come during “Terahvi” (the thirteenth day), if possible. Though there was no doubt that I would come but it shows my dad’s understanding of the problems I may face while coming, when he used “if possible”. Well, I somehow managed to go after overcoming many “problems”. Being with your loved ones during these testing times is something we all want to do.

Amidst all the other benefits of life that people like me who live 1000 miles away from their hometowns enjoy, this is one of those reasons because of which we sometimes feel sad, cursed and even ashamed. I have always felt that pinch of missing out so many events because of only one reason: I was sitting far away from my hometown. But never I felt that pinch so strongly as I’m feeling from last 15 days. What’s the use of all those luxuries of life if you can’t be with people who matter, in times of need? I know I cant do much other than rendering a shoulder but isn’t that the most important thing at these times?

This is not the first time nor is this going to be the last time. This whole thing reminds me of that “one-Bedroom-home” story of a man who roams around the world so that he could afford a home but misses out being with his loved ones his whole life and finally at the end sits alone thinking about the worth of his life.

But this is the price that I have to pay and I have known about it from the beginning itself, as that was the trade-off. I’m living my dream, professionally at least, and have done and achieved much more than what I thought I would be able to, but I think there’s a line which needs to be drawn before its too late. I know I can’t go back to my hometown permanently but the distance can be reduced.

That impending US visa interview is no more exciting and maybe its time to consider those opportunities in Noida/Gurgaon/Pune.